The biggest reason you shouldn't buy a Switch 2 from a random person online

Of the THOUSANDS of reasons you shouldn't

Hey there! So the Switch 2 hasn't been out for a full month yet and, obviously, it is THE big ticket item. Everyone is trying to get their hands on one.

And while the stores seem to be out there seems to be PLENTY of people who have no problem selling "extras" online.

Now, I can get into the various reasons why you shouldn't. Like, the shipper is probably just going to mail you a box with a brick in it. Or the fact that if we just stop buying things from scalpers then the practice would stop. Or the fact that if Nintendo really wants to do that whole "you're just paying for a license" thing, they'd do the next logical step and put a sim card like thing in the Switch 2 where, when a Switch 2 is purchased it would have to be taken out of the box and activated in the store like a smart phone there by making it really hard to just randomly scalp.

There's a lot of those reasons.

But let's say you're more on the chaotic evil side and you still want to roll the dice. There's a REALLY huge reason why you shouldn't go after that Switch 2 you found for a good price online. It's probably bricked.

See, while everyone made a big noise over Nintendo announcing that you are only purchasing the rights to use the Switch 2 and they have the option to revoke your access to the device, no one actually LISTENED to that and Nintendo, the headlining band at the Fuck Around & Find Out Tour 2025, have been bricking systems like crazy.

This can happen for a variety of reasons and most of them boiled down to "little Timmy wanted to play pirate". For example, the BIGGEST reason that so many are bricked is because people used a little something called a Mig Switch Flash Card.

If you don't know what that is, you'll probably hear about it in a month or two when people try to class action suit the maker into the ground. But the Mig Switch Flash Card is "supposed" to be used for people to be able to back up their Switch games in the event something happens to it. Now, if you're a human being on the planet Earth you absolutely know that there ain't no one using it for that. In fact, it's mostly just people sharing their Switch game info so that everyone can pirate Switch games. Someone saying that don't use it for that will also tell you that they don't touch themselves, that they don't fart, and that racism isn't real.

But put one of those bad boys into a Switch 2 and watch your Switch 2 become useless faster than Joker's pencil trick.

I'm an artist

And when this happens, people have been taking it back only to find out that bricking your system does NOT allow you to return it as you misused the item leading people down only one path. ̶L̶e̶a̶r̶n̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶i̶r̶ ̶m̶i̶s̶t̶a̶k̶e̶s̶ ̶ Selling them online as used and/or like new. Usually just with the warning "tried it and didn't like it". Yeah, no shit you didn't like what happened.

But right now the marketplaces, Facebook, Ebay, Craigslist, etc, are flooded with these expensive paper weights. And if places like Gamestop or the Exchange are selling them used you have to take it upon yourself to have faith that the poor person who took it in with a million responsibilities on their plate and a minimum wage paycheck, actually had the time to make sure the system wasn't bricked before taking it in.

So, for real, just don't do this. Nintendo is picking up production and there will soon be available systems in all the stores. It will be fine. You don't need to rush. If your kids are like, "but my friends have it" send them to that person's house. Do it. Send them over there. Spend private time with your spouse. Or don't! Do whatever you want with your free time but for god's sake PLEASE don't be stupid and buy a Switch 2 from some reseller.