All songs from Taylor Swift's "The Life of a Showgirl", ranked
- Ashley Skolrud
- Oct 12
- 7 min read
I have a confession to make, and if you were to look on the internet, they would say it's a controversial one: The Life of a Showgirl is my favorite Taylor Swift album. I went into this album thinking it was going to be a campy, funny album that leaned into the sexy on the outside, funny on the inside vibes of a Vegas Showgirl. And honestly, it met every one of my expectations. It was amazing to finally get a glitter gel pen album after so many of her quill and inkpot albums. Which I think is why so many people hated it - they got too used to Taylor being depressed when she was writing to know what to do when she's actually happy.
This is a no-skip album for me, with every song hitting in different ways. It's become my hype music, and after a week, I can already tell I'm going to have it on repeat for a long time. But just because I love this album, it doesn't mean I don't have favorites.
So here is my ranking of the songs from The Life of a Showgirl - with notes from fellow writer Camila Buck, who loved this album as much as I did.
All songs from "The Life of a Showgirl", ranked
Elizabeth Taylor
This song has taken over my life in THE BEST WAY. Doing my laundry? ELIZABETH TAYLOR! Cooking? ELIZABETH TAYLOR! Trying to focus on literally anything? ELIZABETH TAYLOR! But in all seriousness, I feel like the lyrics of this one are the most on point. I also have a love of Elizabeth Taylor's mark on Hollywood history, so there were so many little easter eggs to her life done so well in the song.
Ruin the Friendship
The twist in this song got me. And it got me good. Regret is such a strange emotion, one that never presents itself until long after the fact. And the twist of it being a high school crush having tragically passed away gets me every time. The storytelling of this song is top-notch, and yet, I feel like it's so underrated when I see people talking about this album.
Actually Romantic
This song is a hilarious banger and an excellent reminder of how we should think about our haters. One of the things that comes with being an author is being prepared for people to hate your books. Luckily, I haven't had that happen yet, but I know it's just a matter of time. But to learn not to take the hate personally, but instead let it comedically roll off your back, is a lesson that I love seeing in this album.
The Life of a Showgirl
Like "Actually Romantic," this song really resonated with my writing career. I've been told so many times not to pursue it because of how hard it is, similarly to the character of Kitty in the song. There's this idea that anyone going into the entertainment industry, whether it be writing, music, acting, or anything else, should be warned away from how hard it is. Especially when all anyone sees is the glamour of it all. The more I listen to this song, the more I relate to it. Also, an Easter egg most people miss from this song: Kitty is named after her mom's giant Great Dane, which Taylor has a beef with.
Honey
Seeing Travis have all of these pet names for Taylor on the New Heights podcast made me immediately fall in love with this song. He is a man who unironically calls her "sweetheart" and "honey" and does it with such love that you can tell she has become his entire world. This song is just full of discovering you finally have the love you deserve, and it warms my heart every single time.
CANCELLED!
Did anyone else learn that American English doesn't have two l's in the word "canceled?" No? Just me? I've apparently been spelling this word wrong for years, but I love the double-l, so I will be keeping it. Anyway, this song really pokes fun at the ridiculous standards people, especially women, are held to on the internet. The fact that she's making fun of the societal flaws that constantly judge us with a catchy beat just makes it a great song to dance to.
The Fate of Ophelia
True story: I debated teaching Hamlet to my students this year. And that is part of the reason I put this song at number seven - the second verse feels like one of my lesson plans. While I know that most people don't know Hamlet in the way I do, it just hits too English Teacher-y and always brings me out of the song. However, every other part of it is so catchy that I can forgive the second verse. ALSO, shout out to Taylor's sourdough being in the music video. Love that for her.
Opalite
I know it's not referencing Fourth Wing. Logically, I know this. But my brain keeps calling this the Fourth Wing song. Anyway, it's a really cute love song. I love that it reinforces that happiness is a man-made emotion. You have to put in the work to get the life you want, and I love that message. This song also feels like it's out of Teen Beach Movie, which is not an insult; I love the 50's pop aesthetics of it.
Eldest Daughter
Track five of this album was one that was seemingly meant for me, as an eldest daughter. And there are some things in the song that felt really close to home. It just didn't hit me in the feels as hard as I wanted it too, so it ended up being a much lower ranking than I had expected it to be. It's a pretty song, but not what I had come to think of as a Taylor track five.
Wi$h Li$t
First of all, this song is getting a lot of hate it does not deserve. That has nothing to do with why I ranked it so low. This song reminds me of Little Women, when Meg tells Jo that just because her dreams are different than her sister's, it doesn't make them wrong. Taylor has dreamed about getting married and having kids for a long time, and she's finally getting the opportunity to get what she has been hoping for. That's not where I am in my life - and that is okay! It's just being in such a different place, makes it not hit as hard for me.
Wood
Tay, I learned more about Travis Kelce than I ever wanted to learn in this song. It's a BOP but GIRL. WHYYYYYYYY?
Father Figure
The Mob aesthetics of this song are really fun, especially as it gives the vibes of when Vegas was a Mob town. (Yes, I know it still is, but not to the extreme it used to be.) I'm not enough of a George Michael fan to know how much she changed. It's a fun song, but I don't think I would choose it as a favorite. Now, if I ever write a song about a criminal underworld, it's definitely making the playlist.
Camila has entered the chat.
Hello, Camila here. One thing I love about my friendship with Ashley is how our opinions differ on some topics. Our preference regarding this album's track list is one of them.
Here is my ranking of all 12 songs in Taylor Swift's album "The Life of a Showgirl":
1) Fate of Ophelia - My daughters and I sing this song all over the house a lot, and twirl around together while doing so. Instant favorite.
2) Wi$h Li$t - I really enjoy the beat of this song and the lyrics. Relatable.
3) Wood - Girl, tell me all about your man's junk and your fantastic sex life. I am here for it!
4) Opalite - As a Fourth Winger (this is now a term), the chorus to this song instantly made me do a double-take. But then I remembered Travis' birthstone is an opal, and it all suddenly made sense.
5) Father Figure - She is my Daddy.
6) Eldest Daughter - This song resonated deeply with me, and not just because I am the eldest in my family.
7) Ruin the Friendship - A classic should've, could've, would've song.
8) The Life of a Showgirl - I am not a Sabrina Carpenter fan (surprise), so this song took a second to warm up to. But once I did, I found I really enjoyed their harmony and the lyrics to the song as well.
9) Honey - Cute song with a fun beat, but not my favorite.
10) Actually Romantic - This is such a good diss track, and I have a few people I personally dedicate it to.
11) CANCELLED! - The fact that if you now Google "Taylor Swift cancelled" you now get everything about this song instead of toxic bullshit about Taylor is such a flex. She knows what she's doing.
12) Elizabeth Taylor - Though this is a fun and catchy song, it's doesn't quite do anything for me. But it doesn't mean it's a bad song - all 12 of these tracks are amazing. I just have my favorites, and this ain't one of them.
Taylor is happy. She is in her best era, and we are all feeling it.
The joy and gratefulness are found in her lyrics, her impressive metaphors and symbolism, and it truly is an ode to finally finding happiness. It's an album that's deeply relatable to those of us who have gone through similar misfortune in our love lives. Not only are these lyrics relatable, but the songs are super catchy. I'll remind you that I am in no way a pop music fan - I mostly listen to electronica with a side of rock and classical - yet I've listened to and obsessed over this album for a whole 9 days now, with no end in sight.
Relatable, catchy, fun to listen to, and perfectly short and sweet. These are all attributes of this instantly classic album.
Which "The Life of a Showgirl" song is your favorite?
Let us know in the comments.
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